How to Channel your Sadness into Beauty
Sadness can be truly debilitating sometimes, leaving us feeling withdrawn, life-less and flat. Whether we feel a relationship is dying, or it's already over, we are bound to feel great sadness. Perhaps we're feeling a sense of loss, or perhaps we feel stuck and unable to move on.
So how, when we're feeling like this, do we take that sadness and channel it into something beautifully creative? How do we transcend the sadness and move forward? Firstly, let's explore what sadness really is, as when we realize what is truly at the heart of our sadness, then we are able to channel it positively.
So how, when we're feeling like this, do we take that sadness and channel it into something beautifully creative? How do we transcend the sadness and move forward? Firstly, let's explore what sadness really is, as when we realize what is truly at the heart of our sadness, then we are able to channel it positively.
What is sadness?
The first thing I want to stress about sadness is that it is natural. It comes to all of us as part of the natural process of life; the ebb and flow that comes with living in a world governed by dualistic principles - It is impossible to truly know something without also knowing the lack of it. Sadness may be triggered by something, or it may simple wash over us without any apparent reason.
Sadness is caused by our observation that things are not okay. A feeling that somehow our reality is unaligned, and doesn't always meet up to the beauty and love that we often feel. It is a playing out of our explorations of our reality, showing us where we may be stuck or attached to people or situations.
Sadness is caused by our observation that things are not okay. A feeling that somehow our reality is unaligned, and doesn't always meet up to the beauty and love that we often feel. It is a playing out of our explorations of our reality, showing us where we may be stuck or attached to people or situations.
The truth behind sadness
When we look a little deeper into all forms of sadness we see that there is one underlying feeling governing the whole experience... love. What we are experiencing is a temporary perceived loss of connection to that love, because we have lost the object/person which triggered it within us. However, when we look deeper, we discover that the love is still there and that our sadness is actually a manifestation of that love. We feel sad because we care. We grieve over loss of a relationship because that person was an object in which we could express our love. We feel sad when there seems to be no channel for us to express our love, which is our natural creative expression of our uniqueness.
So how can we use our sadness to fuel our creative expression of our uniqueness (love)?
So how can we use our sadness to fuel our creative expression of our uniqueness (love)?
Honour the pain
It's very important that we recognize our sadness for what it is, and know that it is a manifestation of our underlying feelings of love. That way we don't condemn it, push it away or ignore it. We embrace it as part of our beauty.
How does the sadness want to express itself? Depending on who you are, perhaps you will want to cry, curl up into a ball or stare off into space.
How does the sadness want to express itself? Depending on who you are, perhaps you will want to cry, curl up into a ball or stare off into space.
Express the love
Once the pain has been honoured and expressed, you can channel this energy into creative expression. Perhaps you want to play some music, write a song, or a poem, draw a picture or dance. You may want to do this separately for both the feelings of sadness and love, or you may want to blend the two together, which can be very powerful.
Finding the real you through it all can be extremely liberating. You discover that sadness and happiness are really two sides of the same coin - love. Thus you allow whatever arises, knowing that who you are underneath doesn't change. Then you express your feelings into the outside world letting those feelings of love ripple out, whichever form that may take.
There may be temptation to let your love take the form of a gesture towards your loved one. This can be a lovely thing to do if you're still in the relationship. However, awareness of your underlying motivation is very important. If you do this, it would be very beneficial to work to let go of any attachment to the outcome of such a gesture (i.e. your relationship improving). If you have already broken up, creating something to honour your ex-partner can be nice thing to do and can even help in the letting go process. However, it is not advisable to give this to your partner at this time if it confuses boundaries.
Finding the real you through it all can be extremely liberating. You discover that sadness and happiness are really two sides of the same coin - love. Thus you allow whatever arises, knowing that who you are underneath doesn't change. Then you express your feelings into the outside world letting those feelings of love ripple out, whichever form that may take.
There may be temptation to let your love take the form of a gesture towards your loved one. This can be a lovely thing to do if you're still in the relationship. However, awareness of your underlying motivation is very important. If you do this, it would be very beneficial to work to let go of any attachment to the outcome of such a gesture (i.e. your relationship improving). If you have already broken up, creating something to honour your ex-partner can be nice thing to do and can even help in the letting go process. However, it is not advisable to give this to your partner at this time if it confuses boundaries.
Watch for the reflection
Life is like a mirror. As we express ourselves into the world around us, we get feedback. This can take the form of reactions from others after sharing your sadness with them, thus connecting through love, or being inspired by your creativity. If love expresses itself purely, without neediness or blame, then people will feel that and reflect it back to you. You can also look out for reflections in nature. Animals express their beauty very well and we can find reflections in them, or even just being warmed by the rays of the sun.
The benefits
When we take this simple approach to heart we will begin to see amazing benefits:
- Feeling that all is okay, whether we are happy or sad. We no longer judge ourselves because we know who we truly are deep down.
- Increased feelings of being alive - I've often heard people who are going through tough times in life remark that despite feeling rotten, they also feel more alive than they ever have before. This can be especially true for break-ups where a sense of freedom or potential can accompany the grief and hurt.
- Increasing sense of connection. Not only do you get to know yourself better, but you may also develop deeper connections to those around you.
A final poem
In the spirit of creativity I'd like to share a short poem I wrote when I was feeling sad during my own breakup process. I wanted to express my sadness but also acknowledge how alive I felt through it.
Today is a sad day,
But that's okay.
I feel my heart beating with sorrow,
And I know that I am beautiful.
For how can beauty not feel sorrow,
to remind us of how openly we love?
I hear a song and I cry,
Tears that make my eyes glisten.
And looking through this shimmering lens,
I know that I am truly alive.
I am alive and I love.
But that's okay.
I feel my heart beating with sorrow,
And I know that I am beautiful.
For how can beauty not feel sorrow,
to remind us of how openly we love?
I hear a song and I cry,
Tears that make my eyes glisten.
And looking through this shimmering lens,
I know that I am truly alive.
I am alive and I love.
