On the spiritual path, allowing your feelings to come through to be fully felt is often touted as the be-all end-all of processing and healing. Yes, it is essential! However, most people I witness are not doing this in a way that catalyses their self-realization. For most people it is simply a release to keep the energy flowing and not become stuck. This is okay in and of itself, however, in order to learn, heal and self-realize from it we have to learn how to approach the process in a conscious way
What most people do when they 'go into' their emotions is get stuck in a subtle victim consciousness or endless thought loops. The victim is very good for the ego because it absolves you from taking responsibility for healing. Endless thought loops keep you from truly moving the energy - they keep you in automatic pilot.
How to tackle emotions in a conscious way
It's all about giving them space without losing yourself in them.
The key is feel them on a purely energetic level without labeling them as this or that or getting lost in the story that caused them. Watch how it presents in your body. What is tightening? Allow the energy to flow through you intuitively through crying, shouting, moving or adopting a position. Then watch to see how it changes.
If you can do it this way, by remaining focused on the energy itself, then something will always move.
But that's not all!
Then we have to look out for a new way of being that might be activating. What wants to come through now? Perhaps it's a fresh or deeper pain - that will have to be unraveled too. Or perhaps you're being invited to express in new, more aligned way.
Feel your wholeness - that feeling inherent in your being when you let go of the story. Ask yourself, "what outcome have I been attached to?" Then feel how to express from the wholeness. This way, anger could turn into passion. Guilt could turn into compassion. There will always be a key to activating this way of being. Perhaps that's a feeling of surrender and acceptance, or determination and focus, or curiosity.
Then watch how the new expression forms and what it creates in your environment.
That is how to feel and heal. It becomes a constant movement. A constant discovery. And life moves!
It has been proven that holding onto resentment, anger, shame and a feeling of being a victim can have detrimental affects on health. Forgiveness, when done properly, not only affects our physical and mental health, but also our spiritual health. In fact, it is our spiritual health that I would like to focus on.
Why most people find it so hard to forgive
Most people see forgiveness as a choice. If only they could find it in their heart then all would be well. But, from a spiritual perspective, this is a mistake. The moment we act like we can force forgiveness onto a situation, we create a subtle ego identity around it. We say "If only I could control my feelings about the situation", thus we fight with our reality.
So, we try to convince ourselves with the mind that "they didn't mean it", or "it couldn't have been any other way". Thus we simply plaster ego on top of ego. If you're persuading yourself of the reasons why you or they need to be forgiven then you've already lost.
If you're making forgiveness the goal, or intending to forgive someone, then you're shooting yourself in the foot.
Did you know that as well as being excellent singers, the common blackbird is also an exceptional listener?
After a period of silently listening, he's off, flying to another destination. A few minutes and he's back again.
This repeats: Sing, listen, act.
What can we learn from the common blackbird?
Sing, listen, act. Mastering these 3 in combination is the key to flow. Leave even one out and we are stuck, unable to continue on our path.
Sing - for why are we here if not to shine ourselves out into the world? Expressing ourselves brings the inner into the outer - then the universe knows what we need.
Listen - for listening is the key to connection. When we truly hear without letting thought and judgment interfere, then we get to know the inner workings of the universe. There is no enlightenment without listening.
Act - for it is through action that the universe, and those around us, knows who we are. Without intention or attachment to outcome, make action the result of singing and listening, and your deeds will always be aligned.
When I do this I feel it intensely, like the river is in my own body. I feel Austria and I feel all the pent-up, misused and released energy being taken up and channeled along this sacred vessel, cleansing all.
Everything is in movement, except when it isn't.
I must admit, I feel happiest when things are moving. When it's aligned in me, it's my catalyzing, leader side. When it's distorted it's a need for things to evolve out of a sense that things could be decidedly better (whatever that means).
That's why I was a little disappointed to discover that the river was not moving (or at least imperceptibly slowly). I had looked forward to moving something.
It's a wonderful reflection and I'm grateful. It whispers to me to trust more in the stillness - that this is creative too.
Even the river has dropped a need to reach a goal today...
The bush in my garden blossoms memories.A fragrance full of childhood wonder - all colours expressed in one sniff.
Two weeks later it's over again. A memory of a memory.
I travel through a place which speaks of ancient magic - a time I somehow know.
The energy remains yet everything is different. I soak it in, and then I leave. When will I return?
It is a special feeling, both heavy and light which keeps me alive as opposed to just existing.
Grief and joy expressed through life's fragile nature.
The act of letting go, of not clinging, allows me to experience the full depth of what this flower, this river, these mountains are.
The moment I want to hold on, the flower disappears and simply becomes an object.